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The Perfect Game

I’ve never been a sports fan–I guess I like my comfort too much to waste time freezing at a football game sitting on uncomfortable bleachers. Or maybe I just figured it was a waste of my time to watch people shove and elbow each other until they were black and blue just to drop a ball in a basket at the opposite ends of the court.  Granted, while I’m at one of those games, I will cheer and holler for my team like everyone else, but if I have a choice of whether or not to attend, I’ll opt for not attending every time.

However, there is one game you can always take me to: baseball. Maybe it’s because I understand the rules; maybe it’s because baseball is a game anyone can play regardless of ability or aptitude; maybe it’s just because baseball is a leisurely game with no time limits.

Ah, there’s the rub. Some smart aleck in sports has decided to change the fundamental principles of baseball by insisting on time limits for pitchers and batters. Really? Are you insane? What practical purpose could time limits serve to improve the game?

Baseball isn’t about time limits. It’s about long summer days, eating hot dogs or nachos and chatting with your friends. It’s about strategy, stepping off the mound or out of the batter’s box at the precise moment to throw off the pitcher or batter. It’s about keeping the first and second base runners honest, so they don’t get too big a lead. It’s about having plenty of time to enjoy America’s favorite sport.

There’s a reason baseball is a favorite, not just in America, but around the world, and it comes back to the leisurely nature of spending time with family and friends. Unlike football and basketball, where one has to be constantly watching, baseball is more laid back. You can take your eyes off the “action” for a moment to gaze at your sweetheart or exchange a bit of conversation with your best friend.  There’s no hurry, no rush, and in today’s frenetic paced society an opportunity to slow down is welcome.

Maybe that’s why even in science fiction, baseball is still around long after all the other sports have faded into obscurity (Deep Space 9). It’s as necessary as the air we breathe. There are a lot of things MLB’s head honchos have done I’m not happy with, but this one takes the cake. To take away even a part of what makes baseball unique for the sake of a few dollars isn’t just a crime, it’s reprehensible.

Don’t mess with perfection.







Why I Hate Daylight Savings Time

Every fall I look forward to the resetting of our clocks to the natural rhythm of the day/night cycle. Every spring I dread the artificial manipulation of time which tends to warp the fabric of rationality and leave us drained and deprived of energy instead of refreshing us.

Daylight savings time is the creation of evil overlords desiring the destruction of the human race.

Maybe there’s some part of the planet where the thing actually works. I’ve never lived there. It makes no sense to me to get up at 7 or 8 a.m. in the dark, and still have daylight at 8 or 9 p.m. at night. The human body wasn’t mean to tweak its natural rhythms to such extremes.

Humans, like morning glories and sunflowers, are set to the natural rhythms of the sun. Get up in daylight, go to sleep at night. The invention of the electric light causes us to be more productive during dark, but it doesn’t upset the human body’s natural rhythms quite like daylight savings time.

Getting up in the dark starts our day off in tired mode. The unnatural sunshine late at night keeps us playing long after we should have been winding down for the day. Instead of a natural rhythm throughout the year, we frenetically overspend during the summer and play catch up during the winter. No wonder Americans are stressed!

Ecuador tried daylight savings time one year. In a country where the sun consistently comes up at 6 and goes down at 6, this seemed a bit ridiculous. But the higher ups wanted to be “civilized.” After about six months of this nonsense, the president had to discard the idea. His people simply did not comply with something that was so utterly counterproductive.

I know all the reasons why people want daylight savings time, but I’ve never seen it work in a way that made sense. From a child’s perspective, I hated having to go to bed while it was still daylight. From a parent’s perspective, I hated having grumpy, irritated children who stayed up too late because they couldn’t sleep in the daylight. As an adult, I hate the false sense of time the extra hours created, lulling me into believing it was still early when in reality it was very late.

So I’m looking forward to getting back to normal and allowing my circadian clock to reset to a proper rhythm. Maybe one day, Americans will be as wise as Ecuadorians and rebel against the stupidity of government officials who mess with the natural order of time

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